“That’s just the way I am”. How many times have we heard ourselves or someone else justify behavior with this statement? A more accurate statement might be “I don’t know how to act any differently”. The first proclamation smacks of an acceptance of personal qualities or behavior no matter their efficacy or value. In contrast, the latter assumes responsibility, optimistically creating th
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“That’s just the way I am”. How many times have we heard ourselves or someone else justify behavior with this statement?
I used to think so. If I gave up some of that responsibility and surrendered, I’d be shirking my responsibilities! And I'd be weak!
The other day I ran into a friend who is also in recovery. We started talking about the ever-elusive idea of a life in balance. We recognized our tendencies to go toward one extreme or the other, to see people and events as either all good or all bad. This phenomenon is sometimes referred to as black and white thinking and many people who are in recovery struggle with it. In a way, this cognitive style can be useful. It may provide us with a sense of c 
What is recovery anyway? What’s the difference between sobriety and recovery? Both concepts may seem equally undesirable during the first phases of help-seeking for addiction, alcoholism or other behaviors that no longer serve us.